06 November, 2010

Life in the Modern World....(sigh)....Phone Dramas Pt II

When last we looked, the author was speculating on what might befall him today as he tried to get his new mobile phone to connect with the network.

Arising at 4:30, he checked the phone only to confirm what he had been dreading- "SIM not provisioned". Turn it back off and leave it on the kitchen bench- definitely too early to go back to the store and deal with it so we went for our regular Saturday ride and coffee(s). And a beautiful morning it was too.....clear skies, light breezes, relatively light traffic and good company. The ride out to Pallarenda and back along the Strand was great- if my new phone was working, I would have taken a picture and posted it for you.

A couple of coffees and some friendly conversation with our cycling mates and it was time to head home and the answer is "No". If you had been playing Jeopardy with Alex Trebec, your response would be, "Alex, the question is, Is BoaB's new phone working?"

So, off I go to the dealer, which up until now I have not named. Let's just say the name is one word of three syllables, the first two rhyme with moda and the last rhymes with phone- actually it is phone but spelled in a different manner. The young sales assistant with whom I have been dealing looked somewhat crestfallen when I walked in. She was dealing with another customer but as soon as she saw me, she knew I wasn't there for a social visit.

One of the other employees came to assist me and started the enquiry process with their internal phone contact to the customer service/operations centre. After a few minutes of waiting on hold (it even happens within their own company) he asked if I wanted to wait in the food court area in the shopping mall. I advised I would just wait patiently at the counter- by the main service area, where other customers could see and perhaps vicariously experience my frustration- while he attempted to resolve my issue. And if anybody asked, I was going to be more than happy to share my experience with their service.

My best estimate would be 40 minutes. In that time, the young bloke assisting me didn't really accomplish much and ended up passing the phone back to the original sales assistant- let's call her Lauren- if for no other reason than that is her name.

Lauren speaks with someone somewhere who can't do anything to assist and may as well have been trying to get a request through NASA to get the Hubble telescope to take a picture of Uranus which is where I was considering asking them to put the phone. I could tell by the exasperated look that this was not going to be good news- funny that...

The "Incident" as it shall now be called, has been escalated yet again from Level 1 (which I think is a group of simians with keyboards) to Level 2- which I guess is a good thing- not the simian keyboardists but the fact it has been escalated to Level 2. Now I guessed that this was not necessarily a desirable outcome as I was advised that the Level 2 support group doesn't work weekends and my phone will definitely be connected by Monday (or Tuesday).

I don't think I said anything for a few moments, at which point I must have looked like I was going to set fire to the phone and the contract paperwork because Lauren asked, "Do you want to cancel your contract? Because if you do, I would understand but I am unable to do that. You need to contact our customer service centre and stay on hold until both batteries in your cordless phones are dead and you still haven't spoken to a real human." She didn't actually say the italicised thingy but gave me all of the information on what I needed to say to the robovoice to get in touch with the right people.

And I think what convinced her that I was serious was when I mentioned the telecommunications ombudsman and service levels for connections of service within reasonable timeframes upon entering into a contract.

So I came home and rang the number and said all of the right things to Robovoice who advised she was connecting me to the correct area only to find out that they work the same shift as the Level 2 group and nobody would be available to answer my questions until Monday morning.

Anyhow, tomorrow morning there is another nice 90km ride. Too bad I won't be able to take any pictures for you.

Cheers- ride safe



Trevor Woodford said...

I really enjoyed this post. Although I could see what was coming it had me in fits of laughter - not so funny for you though..!

Can't wait for the next instalment.

BoaB said...

Thanks Trevor- I am trying to see the lighter side of this but it is wearing thin very quickly. Sanjeev Bhaskar might be able to make a whole series out of this sort of thing...hang on a minute...."Mumbai Calling" sounds very familiar.